PART 1
In society today, with the hustle and bustle that takes place – rushing here, hurrying there, having to stay on the move – it leaves little room to stop, admire, and enjoy what’s in front of us. When first coming into this world, an infant is able to simply “be,” moving, growing, stretching, developing at his or her own pace. But with the need to do so much within a course of 24 hours, it quickly becomes apparent that the most perfect of infants is also taught to join the rat race, all for the sake of what? The information they receive is a strong message to value everything outside of who they are in order to be “successful” in this life. It’s not long before the little bundle of joy is programmed, like a computer downloading a software program, to rush for school, rush to complete homework, rush to bed, rush to music or sports practice, and rush to do any other manner of busy activity they’re engaged in. The life of the baby, toddler, child, and teen becomes a blur of all sorts of values except where it counts.
So the question remains: What is this all for? For each parent, the “what” varies, as it serves a value that’s as unique and individual as the perspective of the person answering the question. From this writer’s perspective, the only thing to value has nothing to do with how much can be accomplished, how far the race is run, how many things can be gained or how high one can reach. Value is simply the understanding of what “IS” and recognizing its worth for only that. It’s an expression of the almighty I AM, with nothing to prove, do or be.
This is what valuing self is all about. As we have been programmed to value that which isn’t us, it’s easy to become jaded with the thought that our worth as great human beings is in just being us, not from trying to be someone else. This applies to children in particular. The greatest value any child has is in being his or herself. But if they’re not shown how to honor their true essence, they develop in ways that are anti-self validating.
Of course, as parents, we are examples to our children for what they consider valuable and where society places its value. In my introduction above, I cited how the pressures of time to meet a fast-paced lifestyle are one way our modern-day society chooses to value its citizens and its own worth. This same society also places inordinate value on certain select people like movie stars, sports figures, business moguls and other celebrated personalities that it places on a pedestal as extraordinary individuals, or heroes, as if the rest of society cannot possibly achieve that level of greatness. And then, of course, these celebrities demonstrate a lifestyle that other mere mortals strive for, motivating the strong push against time to acquire and accomplish things.
And this is the principle demonstrated to children. They struggle to assume an obligation to “fit in” while, at the same time, meet the expectation of racing ahead of the pack and soaring above the rest. It’s a testament to where society places its value, which is less than sublime when examined beneath the surface.
The irony, however, is that the people who are valued most are also the very ones who are absolutely themselves 100-percent real. They don’t behave or act like anyone other than themselves. This alone is what makes them so extra-ordinary. These people are purely who they are everyday in every way.
It poses a conundrum. For extraordinary people are valued for being their authentic selves while parents are busy (however unconscious) influencing their children to conform to mediocrity. Parents will instruct their children to value certain celebrities and be like them, but then to make sure those children are like everyone else to fit in. The mixed messages parents send can be so confusing that it results in rebellious behavior, as they leave their children to wonder if they will ever be accepted, valued, or understood for who they are.
When a baby is born, is it fully valued for the being it is? How many parents really see him or her completely? The fingers and toes are counted. The nose, eyes and lips are examined to ensure that all are intact. And, of course, they are measured for any similarities to immediate or extended family members. Seeing the baby as a body in this way – assessing it only for whether it is fully formed or healthy or not – is misguided value. Yes! It is misguided because truly that baby – that newly formed person – is a spirit operating in a physical body. The body is “not” who or what he or she is. The body is only a covering (much like wearing a garment) that remains stationary throughout one’s lifetime.
If a baby, when first delivered, is seen as the beautiful, powerful, fully developed spirit that it is, that baby will grow to value the essence of self, knowing that, regardless of societal programming, everything learned and experienced in life is only an expression of the one, true, correct value – set where it should be – in the “I AM” and no place else.
Lynne Herod-DeVerges, founder Center of Light Miracles and Miracles Directory
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